Mike DeStefano: Third Best Friend

I do a lot of jokes about black people because my third best friend is black, OK? And I've had people say, 'Why does he have to be third?' And I'm like, 'Well, Mr. Sharpton, he's not that good of a friend. If he was a better friend, I'd move his black ass up. I'm not holding him down; I'm not holding a brother down -- I just don't have affirmative action friendships.'