An old man enters a confessional and proudly exclaims, "Father, I have to tell you what happened to me last night. I'm 90 years old, and I made love to two 18-year-old women for eight hours!"
The stern priest replies, "That is a sin. I will have to give you a penance."
"Father, you can't give me a penance."
"Because I'm Jewish."
The perplexed Father asks, "Then why are you telling me?"
"I'm telling everyone!"