A city guy buys a ranch. He sits on the porch of his new house taking in the fresh country air when a dusty truck pulls up.
"Howdy, neighbor!" calls the man in the truck. " I came to invite you to a little Welcome to the Neighborhood party at my place tonight. "
"Well, that's mighty fine of you," the city guy replies.
"It's going to be great," the neighbor adds. "There's gonna be eatin', drinkin', fightin', and f**kin'!"
"Sounds great," the city guy replies. "What should I wear?"
"Aww, it don't matter," the neighbor says. "It's just gonna be you and me!"