Marta Ravin: Work-Related Medical Condition

I have unfortunately developed a medical condition. I don't know if any of you people have ever heard of it, it's called 'office ass.' You get it from sitting on your ass and eating M&Ms all day. It's at a pretty advanced stage right now. So, I looked in our benefits brochure to see if they cover, and they don't, which I just find so rude because I definitely got it at work.